We are funny us human beings….We really don’t have a clue how fast time goes, but we do….. if you know what I mean !!….
As a human being (or some would argue a weirdo from out of space) my down fall when it comes to life lessons is that I don’t do change ….
well I do do change sometimes but only because it’s forced on me …
but its a real ‘tuffy’ ….I really struggle …..
I like to be in control ….
I like to be incharge of my destiny …..
How, where and when we gather our resources for living as grown ups is actually quite incredible ….and as time passes by and we become those grown ups we are constantly searching ,seeking and learning from all that life throws at us ….
For me losing my dear Mum at the age of 10 left me bewildered ,frightened and very lonely… regardless of the adults trying to support and nurture me and my younger sister it was tuff, but also taught us some very valuable lessons……
I ponder and wonder about this …..
If we were given the opportunity to turn back the clock but taking the knowledge with us from our life path so far, what we would act out if we were back in the world of ‘Lets pretend’ ….
The age of say between 2 to about 7 years old ……The years (I believe ) that are the most influencing years of our lives…..
You must remember those days ?? ….
Play time on the play mat at play school with the wheeble family all lined up ready to go off to the park for a picnic…. a friend taking charge of pushing the weeble bus across the colourful road like play mat…..
Across this mat is a boy…He is playing but is keen regardless of upsetting anyone as he plays goodies and baddies with a couple of old battered corgi cars ……He has decided there will be an earthquake and he is enthusiastically pulling at the mat causing it to ruck up …..
The Weeble bus has fallen over and the boy who has now erupted into a rumble of spit splattering, throat gurgling noises is shuffling on his knees, he is hanging onto his car as it flies in slow mo across the sky turning in his hand like he’s a pro majorette …..
By this time We’ve told on the boy who’s ruined our Weeble picnic …..but the teacher is distracted from talking to the boy who ruined our role play because she’s clocked a boy peeing up against the stand in the book corner ….she is aware it needs to be cleaned up before play time finishes because thats where we will all be sitting in less than 10 minutes time !!!!
Or perhaps your imagination is working overtime as you take in the ever changing, enthusiastic voices of the teacher who is reading your favourite story book ….
She is flipping over the pages as she reads upside down, her double chin resting on her necklace, the necklace you gaze at whenever you are in first aid having a sticky plaster put on you ….The magic kiss given to stop you crying which in this day and age would have you arrested …
Her words are spilling out as she tells the story, bringing to life the beautiful ,colourful images that have your imagination running wild …..
You sit with your neck titled slightly backwards ,your eyes as wide as saucers….
Story time was always a real treat. It took place just before milk and biscuits were served….
For me at play school I remember standing in a red wooden phone box and dialling up more often than not the doctor, because in the wooden play house the baby had a fever….
This fever set about by drawing chicken pox in red chalk all over the doll’s face ….. 🙂 🙂
There was another play mate dressing up in the dress up area putting on a wonky nurses headscarf as she pretended to answer a pretend phone ….
The nurses hat sat squiffy , half of it across one of her eyes and the elastic sat uncomfortably ,cutting into her chin which was causing her to grimace as it pinched ….
we had managed to create an air of worry about us…. hurry hurry this is serious……
We are only 3 and a half ….
Such drama hey !!!
A ‘Real ‘casualty moment was unfolding before us …
WOW …We were film stars in the making !!
The inside out blue and white striped dress was caught up in a menagerie of what she deemed hospital like……
A wonderful array of brightly coloured, over sized plastic gadgets clutched under her arm as she dragged all sorts towards the play house ………
Bang bang bang on the wooden door she thudded ….The wooden play house at risk of collapsing as the door swings open and they drag themselves and all the equipment through that tiny doorframe…
The baby by this time was being pulled from the crib by the boy who’d been chosen to play ‘Dad ‘…
He’s stuck in the house because me and my friend told him he HAD to play …
Goodness we were Bossy whatnots !!!
The boy has this tiny tears dolly by the leg as he has whipped it out from under the beautiful silky square bedding (most probably hand made)…. It was a pale colour of lemon with the most beautiful lace trimming all the way round it …..
I loved how it felt against my face… all soft and silky ….
Anyway the boy presents this baby to the nurse eager to leave the play house to play something more boy like !!!
How sexist were we back in the 70’s …..
The boys were normally found in either the water or sand play or they were building towers from anything they could stack up ….most of them were found with their hands deep in the car box trying to find their favourite jukes of hazard car or fighting over the yellow sit on diggers in the yard….
As always by the time we had bossed each other about deciding on who would play what role and then finding a boy stupid enough to want to play ‘Dad’ and then onto sorting out our costumes …..
The play school teacher has hollered back to the mat please !!!!
Yep …that half hour of allocated role play time was over and we were asked to leave the play house, putting our costumes back into the fancy dress box and heading back to the middle mat ready to prepare for finger painting , play dough (oh I loved eating the salty, colourful homemade play dough ) or such like …….
Oh if only life could be that easy …..
For a start that baby that we had called the nurse for half an hour earlier was miraculously better, left upside down ,face-planting the lemon satin bed set ,half the red chalk smeared onto our fingertips now……
and not much left on the doll either …….
The doll would stay there until another tot decided to role play….perhaps giving birth to it and breast feed it as they’d seen their mummy doing to their baby brother or sister….
Or perhaps the boys got there first grabbing the doll and lying it out on the car mat to use its soft fabric mid drift to make a ramp big enough for the Jukes of Hazzard car to do its stunts…….
We are learning life skills right from the word go …….and we aren’t really aware…..
But back then, when we were little, everything seemed black and white …
praised for being good and scolded for being bad …
We were never very aware of our parent’s problems ……Most of us were protected from the world…
The same ever-changing adult world we now live in …..
So from Play time ….where we were preparing for a life as adults blissfully unaware that we were building our personalities and putting coping strategies into place through our play …
to Real time.…where we live our daily lives coping with our own toil and tribulations constantly searching for answers … unfortunately ,usually stressing until we make ourselves ill over debt problems ,marriage problems ,family issues our own personal demons ….
The list goes on …….
and then to Face time... we use our phones and computers to face time to skype anybody we feel fit to help us ,be it a stranger on a web page or a close friend or a family member living near by or miles across the sea…..
Just 20 years ago you would have had to phone after 6pm when the land line charges were so much cheaper or on a Sunday if it were international …….. 🙂 🙂
Smart phones, social media ….instagram, tweeting …. They were non existent when I was growing up and I’m not that old now …I’m only 43 !!!….
I did my learning through childhood role play, story books and adult guidance …..
I only got a small amount of TV daily ,usually after pebble mill at lunch time on the UK TV, whilst my mum had mashed banana on brown toast sprinkled with all bran with a mug of black coffee ( she always watched her weight) ……….. But I wasn’t watching my weight…. I was watching The Flumps …Playschool…Button moon…Lets Pretend and Bag puss …..
So as an adult ,am I still in control of my destiny ??….
well sort of …. in the sense that I choose to take my life day by day …
I try to be present in the moment because time has past me by way to fast and I’ve missed so much because I learnt to fear and I learnt to panic …….
I like to capture my daily life through photos …
I turn them into books…..
I then have something tangible to touch and to hold….These photos I look at on those days when life gets me down and I find it all to hard ….
Living with MS was never part of my childhood role play…….
but being happy was …..
lots of love kirsten xxx
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