If you have read my previous blogs I will be painting you a picture of my life ….and so It won’t surprise you when I tell you I believe in fate.
I believe everything happens for a reason…
Happy things and sad things, even the shittiest of things have a purpose….
Our experiences are unique, the circumstances are personal and although you may find people trying to own your story by expressing that they too have experienced the same, whether that be a trauma or illness or miracle or job or …. the list goes on …
They aren’t you and they aren’t living your story ….
So although it may seem that they care enough to share their experience, that is all they are doing…they are off loading in some way and relieving their own personal pain….
It’s not very often that you find someone who is so empathetic and also extremely helpful always putting you first…..
I simply love the mystery of life…well most of the time …
I don’t like the bad stuff !!!
To be honest who does but you have to take the good with the bad …..
For me there has been a fair few bad moments, but everyone has them don’t they?
Some people just choose not to share …
For me it’s better out than in and this ability to share has helped me heal …
I have learnt to choose wisely who I share with…
I know who in my life will help me through the tuff times without judgment or criticism and I also know those who can be trusted ….
Those people are priceless …. true gems …
My first experience of fate was meeting my future husband twice through the same girl a few years apart.
I was lucky enough to have met someone on the first day of senior school.
Little did she or I know that she would play a large part in my life….
Her name is Lucy … She is one of those truly rare gems ,she a real blessing to have in our lives……
My first day at school was absolutely awful.
My Step mum had forgotten it was my first day and took me in half way through the day.
I can’t hold her fully responsible for the event as my Dad hadn’t played any part in preparing me for senior school and hadn’t checked to see what date I was starting either.
As you can imagine that was probably the worst thing that can possibly happen on your first day at senior school.
The whole year group had met in the school hall and had been divided into their form groups. They had had most of the day to form loose friendships with the people they had been sat next too.
My form group had been given all sorts of books, they had been on a tour, met plenty of teachers and had survived the school canteen.
So for me, walking in after lunch was really daunting, they all just stared at me …
and the sad thing was there was not one person from my old school in my form group.
Now adays each child can write a friend’s name down on their school forms stating who they would like to be with on arriving in a form group in senior school.
For me this would have been extremely useful. I mean I had already lost one of the most important people in my life. Surely the school knew that and would look after me.?
Lucy became a close friend very quickly and she has been a shining star in my life since ….who would allow hours of rolling to go on at youth club so I could pass my hairdressing modules lol !!
I had to cycle to school come rain or shine for the whole of my senior school years and because of this I was able to cycle a route that allowed me to meet Chris every day…
I would cycle around the houses to meet Lucy and then together we would cycle onto the benches…We would sit waiting for Chris to walk the main wimborne road towards the benches opposite the embassy youth club…….
These benches stretched around the wall of an old beautiful church with a good old fashioned church cemetery. At night you didn’t want to be on these benches. They attracted the local trouble makers as the sun set and dusk arrived followed by the local drunks.
I always looked forward to seeing Chris. He had blonde curtains and wore a black blazer and trousers to school with his school tie. I always giggled at his school bag, A flimsy Nike rucksack, well actually it was more like a swim bag or p.e bag, but it had Bros written in tippex across the back. (His friends had put it there as a joke!!)
It didn’t take long for him to ask me out. I did say yes, but we never went anywhere and although we met most days on route to school at these benches we didn’t kiss or hold hands.
It was cute and innocent, but sadly it fizzled out, well to be honest it never really got going. For me it was just nice to know I had been noticed …It was nice to know I was liked by a boy!!
The next time we met apart from those benches was at a church youth club in Sutton Road.
I had been talking to Lucy about going to her youth club for a few weeks. We were now 14 and it seemed cool to hang out with friends, play pool and chat the evening away. I knew my parents would approve of a church youth club and they had no problem with me going every Wednesday evening. So it was organized that I would cycle to Lucy’s and we would go together.
I was so excited!!!!
We had been chatting at school about which boys were going, but she never mentioned Chris or the connection was never made, either way you can imagine as we walked up the staircase together to the upper hall, my surprise as He turned smiling at me.
He headed straight over to say HI…..
He had a leather brown jacket on with denim on the inside a pair of jeans and a shirt ….
I knew right then that he was the one for me, but it took another year before we got together
We had time to build an amazing friendship. He was my closest male friend. All our friends intertwining over the next 12 months it meant we both dated each other’s friends. He dated my best friend Jo before I went out with him, but she was cool with that …..although my kids think it rather strange that Jo and I still see each other regularly another beautiful soul in my life ….(I’m so lucky to have people around me that care )
Chris and I were always hanging out together just in the arms of other people….
The day we got it together (and no not sexually lol) …was a big a shock for us, but it didn’t seem to shock Lucy or the rest of the gang. All I will say is that I was the happiest I had been in years….
It was my turn to walk a couple of blocks from youth club to collect a friend of ours from her dance class. Chris had decided that he would walk with me. He was 16 I was 15 ….
We arrived at the hall a bit early so decided to stand in the porch way to keep the wind off us.
I cuddled into Chris innocently to keep warm and then he asked me a really random question….
It led to a kiss and the rest as they say is history lol ……That was a part of my life I believe was most probably guided by fate …..
You see I had known Chris when I was a little girl. We had danced together at a local dancing school. I’m not sure if we ever partnered when ballroom dancing, but I’m pretty sure with the dancing games the group played, we must have dance together at some point.
It doesn’t really matter, the point I’m trying to make here is that I truly believe my mum has never left my side and that I have always been supported and protected from a higher realm….…..To many things have happened with witnesses I will add to say otherwise……they will be future blogs :)….
I could make this part of the book where boy meets girl a child sweetheart romance, a real romantic novel and let you believe that we did dance as little kids ….
I could do it just because every book has a happy ending, but that’s not how it happened ….
However, I truly believe my mum played a huge part in making sure we met again as she would certainly have known all the kids and their parents from the dancing school I attended….
I like to think she had vetted my Chris lol (the poor boy )!!…
Maybe she interfered allowing the universe to guide us both together …
whatever it was I’m so pleased we are together….
Chris is a special part of my life ,the father to my children …he is my best friend……
and lucy was the one who introduced us ….
Ta so bloody muchly Lucy….
So have faith and go with the flow if it feels right ….
love kirsten xxx