Plop and ripple ……

It’s affecting everyone I know and love already and the rollercoaster although it has been going for a life time yet it feels like it has only just begun for many .

It’s a rollercoaster that I am never allowed to get off of  …and now you’ve joined me ….

We all go on rides that we think ‘thank god its over ‘  struggling to find our feet once the barrier gets raised !!!…

I can handle a ride that flips you upside down and wrenches you from one side of your seat to the other…  I lived for a thrill, anything fast and anything crazy ….My hubby and friends will tell you that …. but I must say I normally like to get off and put my feet back firmly on the ground …..

I used to scream if I wanted to go faster ….

I am now just screaming because I want it all to stop …..

 …A ride is over in 2 minutes….

You choose to get on it and then the operator lets you off …

But this ride has buckled me up for keeps… I’m talking about my MS Journey, but Covid 19 is doing the same to all of us at the moment  …

I’m shackled to a life time of uncertainty, pain and an ever changing  progressive level of disability as is our planet as is our lives ….

To lose what you knew and prepare for change (and I mean permanent change )is challenging …

The perfect way for me to explain the impact of a life changing experience and how it feels to be the nuisance that effects more than just the person it is happening to is to use an analogy….

 My situation mimics the effects of a pebble hitting the surface of the water in a pond.

 As the shiny pebble breaks through the surface of the water the impact creates a big splash and then comes the ripples.

They ripple out in a perfect circle, the ripples are beautiful to watch, hypnotizing and enchanting, but it’s actually disturbing and distorting the water as it sinks to the murky depths.

This beautiful shiny pebble that sat on the path way next to this beautiful pond was picked up, chosen perhaps because it was shiny or smooth or looked perfect for skimming.

I wonder why I was chosen to plop into this big pond?

I wasn’t ready for it that’s for sure…

 Why couldn’t I be left on the side of the path way …

I was safe secure and happy where I was….I wasn’t aware that I deserved to be picked and plopped !!

but now I’m joined by many pebbles from many parts of the waters edge …and my god the splash when we all got thrown in together was catastrophic ….some of us sunk straight away …some of us got caught in the current some of us luckily only hit the shallows of the waters edge, but wherever you landed one thing was certain as we went into lockdown ….we were all in it together ….

 So what have a learnt in my life so far that has prepared me for this ?

It certainly wasn’t a future I ever thought I would have to seriously think about …MS or covid 19 

 This covid  journey that we are all on is having the same impact on all of us with change happening fast pace, knocking  us down when we weren’t looking  …

We are challenged to change ourselves to change our thoughts and to change our behaviours to make this world  better place …A place with a future where kindness is everywhere, the ego is no longer driven by social media celebrities and money  and the planet lives on in all its glory …..

One person said to me last week that I’m coping extremely well with this isolation … reply was this …..

“I’ve been like this for 3 years …yes I know can’t go out right now as i used to and thats a change for me, but I know I will be able to enjoy the world again once the restrictions have lifted ….Life changed over night 3 years ago, restrictions and challenges were set out before me bak then and i didn’t see it coming ….but I’ve already adapted …i have made many changes ….I just need to adapt again “!! 

and as I’ve said before I may have MS but MS won’t define me it will only make me stronger ….

The same mindset may well be a good thing for you too ….

Covid 19 will make our world stronger …It will make our world kinder and it will make us think about so many things in a different way  ….Expectation ,values, habits, work/life balance, life goals ,nature …….

but the healing will come for ourselves and the planet when we have cultivated  the ability to make  so many changes and the challenge will be to stick to it ….

I’m stuck with MS and we will be stuck with a dying planet unless we learn from the plop and ripple that we have currently find ourselves in……

 I will leave you to ponder over this ….

What have you changed or what will your change be on the other side of covid 19   ……

love and light kirsten ….

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